Don't Drink The Haterade

I’ve come to the unfortunate conclusion that I’ve become something that modern day society despises. I “hate” that it has come to this and am reluctant to admit it, but I’ve peacefully come to grips with this sad reality.

I am a “hater.”

I used to think that I wasn’t a hater. I’ve always subscribed to the original definition of the term. The common idea that I’ve seen from different definitions of the term that I’ve found (urbandictionary.com, wikipedia.com, wiktionary.com) is consistent with what I originally perceived it to mean. For the most part, a “hater” originally described someone who is so envious of another person that he or she is bent on preventing said person’s further success. A hater cannot stand to see that person do well and usually has no good reason to dislike or antagonize said person. I think most people would agree that such a person has issues. Most of us have better things to do than to be obsessed with someone else’s demise.

Even this definition of the term “hater” has become very popular. Many catch phrases and songs have been dedicated to “haters.” “Don’t be a hater.” “Let your haters be your motivators.” “Don’t hate, congratulate.” “Hi, Hater.” People have even come to measure their success by the amount of “haters” they have. One of my favorite comedians, Katt Williams has this to say about “haters”:

“Ladies, if you got 14 women hatin’ on you, you need to figure out how to get to 16 before the summer get here! Fellas, if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them…!”

While I can agree that success inevitably comes with people who will be envious or jealous of you, there is a part of me that can’t really take this mindset seriously. I mean, do people really have that many enemies? That many “haters”? The way some people describe having “haters” sounds a lot like how people describe having roaches, rats, or any other kind of pest.

Okay, I’ve veered away from my main point, but I had to throw that out there. Again, if we go with the original meaning of the word, I am not a “hater.” But oh, how times (and definitions of words) have changed. If you consider the context in which the word “hater” is used in modern slang, movies, and music, a “hater” is now anyone who disagrees with you, dislikes your work, or even has an opinion that is contrary to what is popular, regardless of the legitimacy of your reasons. As you can probably imagine by now, I feel that this word is horribly misused and overused.

For example: I respect Kobe Bryant as a basketball player. I think he is arguably the best basketball player in the NBA right now and probably will be for quite some time. However, I do not like him because of his arrogance. The man entered the NBA draft out of High School and told the team that drafted him that he would no play for them and demanded to be traded. This just reeks of arrogance and ingratitude to me. However, if I so much as say that I don’t like Kobe Bryant, I would barely be able to shape my mouth to begin to state my case as to why before someone would label me as a “hater.” Another example, I dislike Soulja Boy’s music. I admit, the first few dozen times I heard “Crank Dat Soulja Boy” I danced right along with everyone else. However, after that got old and I actually paid attention to his lyrics, I felt that they lacked the substance I was looking for that would make me want to even hear his songs on the radio, let alone spend money on him. But again, let me even hint at the fact that I don’t like him, and someone will label me a “hater.”

Yet another example, I was having a conversation with a female friend of mine about men carrying “man-purses.” (I have to stop and say that I seriously question the masculinity of anything that has to have the prefix “man-“ added to it.) I respectfully stated that I don’t agree with men wearing “man-purses” or “man-bags”, and that you wouldn’t catch me wearing one. She quickly responded, saying “You can’t hate!!! Everyone has their own style.” “How am I hating? I’m just stating my opinion?” I asked. Can I not have my own opinion? Is it not ok to disagree with someone or something? Am I forever doomed to have to conform to what is popular?

In this American society where everyone believes they’re entitled to so much (there goes yet another word I’ve come to hate: “entitlement,” but that’s another blog for another day. Oh, look! I said “hate” again. I’m such a hater), one would think I’d be entitled to have and state my own opinion, but I guess that’s too much to ask nowadays. If you’re not down with what’s popular, if you don’t like what everybody else likes, you’re a “hater.” Don’t dare play “Devil’s Advocate” or offer constructive criticism. You might be considered king of the haters for going that far. Considering all of this, I decided to go ahead and label myself a “hater.” I am a “hater-hater”, if that makes any sense. I’m hatin’ on the whole concept of “hatin’.” I encourage anyone reading this to not be afraid of being called a “hater.” Don’t drink the haterade that society is serving you and think that you have give up your ability to think independently and decide for yourself if you like something or not. To paraphrase Common, a hip-hop artist that I highly respect, “If you don’t like it, you don’t like it. That don’t mean that you’re hatin’.”