"Post Congress Depression"
8.30.10
Yep. It's Monday. Again. Just the thought of Monday is enough to depress most people. However, for me, this particular Monday is depressing for more than the usual reasons. I'm suffering from a disorder that we salser@s call "Post Congress Depression", or PCD for short.
I can't say that I came up with the term, but I can relate to it as much as the next salser@. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term, it is a condition that occurs after attending a salsa congress or any other large-scale salsa event. The main idea of PCD isn't exclusive to salsa congresses, however. We all experience something similar on a 3-day weekend out of town or on vacation. You feel like you're outside of reality for a while; on an island or in a bubble of sorts, shielded from all the monotony, stress and madness you'd otherwise experience at home. That drive or plane ride home is always depressing and somber because you realize that the inevitable has finally arrived: it all had to end sooner or later.
Salsa Congresses (or, as in my most recent episode, a salsa retreat) add a completely different dynamic to the whole end-of-vacation crash. You've experienced brain-overload from attending numerous workshops, witnessed jaw-dropping performances, and had amazing dances from some of the best dancers in the world for a whole weekend. You've met new friends and caught up with old friends from congresses past. You've partied till the sun came up and slept in late. Then, all of a sudden, it hits you. You realize that you soon have to leave this place of salsa euphoria and go back home. Back to the real world. Back to work, bills, kids, or whatever other issues you didn't give a millisecond of thought to because you were so busy losing yourself on the dancefloor.
PCD affects every salsaholic in various degrees, and at different times. Maybe PCD hits you when the promoters queue the lights at 4am on Sunday night-slash-Monday morning, chanting the familiar line of "you ain't gotta go home, but you gotta get the heck outta HERE." Maybe it hits you when you realized it will be months, if not longer, before you get another dance with your new salsa crush with whom you had that blissful dance on Saturday night. Maybe PCD starts to set in during the day on Sunday, when you realize that you only have one more night left before it all ends. Maybe it hits you when you realize you had one drink too many on Sunday night and forgot that you didn't take Monday off from work. Or, maybe you're completely oblivious of it for a few days, and it doesn't hit you until you're back home at your local salsa scene, and you're no longer surrounded by such a high concentration of amazing dancers.
As I stated earlier, I was on the heels of a week-long salsa retreat, so I had an extra dose of PCD that went down about as easy as a tablespoon of castor-oil. (Those of you who had old-school grandmothers armed with a cabinet full of home remedies know how dreadful that tastes.) I spent a week taking about 4-5 classes per day, filled with spin drills, styling, body control/posturing, sick choreography and footwork, and all among the company of some beautiful new friends, inside and out. Oh, and don't even get me started on all the wacky randomness and laughs we all shared. We even had a meet and greet that of course was a salsaholics-anonymous meeting in disguise. It was like a reality show with all the positives and none of the negatives. Well, unless of course you consider the fact that we all swore we heard Jason Vorhees' voice every time we stepped out of our cabins. Anyway, somewhere between Thursday evening and mid-day Friday, PCD began to rear its ugly head. We slowly came to grips w/ the fact that it was all going to end pretty soon. Yeah, we knew it would, but that didn't make it any less sad. Hey, when you get to leave behind everything else and spend any length of time doing nothing but what you love and doing it with others who feel the same, you can't help but wish it wouldn't end. But end, it must. Ah, well... life must, and does go on. Gotta work to feed the addiction. AHEM, um... I mean, pay the bills. Hey, say it how you like. Whatever helps you sleep better at night.
So there you have it, PCD. The epitome of our salsa addiction. We overdose on our drug of choice, knowing we have one huge salsa-hangover waiting for us once we get home. Yes, one other semi-depressing thing a congress does is leave you craving the next one. When you get to do it all over again. :-)
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
SMOOVEisms
Original quotes and random facts about your favorite salsaholic ;-)
"That's Beautiful." (My all-purpose phrase for anything good, bad, funny, tragic, etc.)
- I never gave any thought to dancing before I found salsa. I was quite the wall-flower (or, wall-weed since I'm a guy) prior to salsa, and had serious stage fright.
"Off tha chain like a free slave!"
- I was born on the first day of winter (In 1982, Winter solstice was Dec. 22). Maybe that's why, if forced to choose between the two, I'd choose to be too cold instead of too hot.
"Fresh breath is VERY underrated..."
- I was a very picky eater as a child. I wouldn't eat sandwiches, chicken, or fish, and I would only eat the toppings off of my pizza, leaving the crust. All that has changed, of course.
"Put some STANK on it!"
- I eat my burger before my fries. One day I realized that pretty much everyone else does the opposite.
"You got more issues than a magazine stand."
- I eat my cereal dry on purpose. However, I will drink milk as a beverage along w/ it, but only strawberry or chocolate.
"You'll never look good until you're not afraid to look stupid"
- I have a large dark birthmark that resembles freckles on my left arm that goes from the edge of my shoulder to just above my elbow. There is also a small stray dot of it that somehow made it to my right forearm.
"Being lead by your heart is like being lead by a Magic 8-Ball"
- I have an older half-brother that I've known for about 2 and a half years now. However, one would think that I was the half-brother out of the 3 of us, since I'm the only male in the family under 200 lbs, and I look everything like my mom and nothing like my dad.
"There's a reason why your windshield is bigger than your rear-view mirror."
- My name is indirectly a Biblical name. It is Greek for Myrrh, which is the scent that they gave baby Jesus as a gift. I've also seen it translated to mean "sweet smelling oil/balm" or "fragrant oil", which, in layman's terms would mean "cologne."
"Your dancing should reflect the music you're dancing to; so much that a deaf person would be able too see what the music would look like by watching you dance."
- My initials are MMA, which is funny since I am a big UFC fan (MMA = Mixed Martial Arts)
"Dancing is when your body says things that you never knew you wanted to say. You express things that words would never be able to describe."
- I'm very "anti-cliche". Meaning, if "everybody and they momma" likes/does/wears something, there's a good chance that I won't, simply for that reason. For example, if I see both Beyonce and Amerie at the mall and could only choose one autograph, I'm going straight for Amerie.
"Dance like no one is watching. But, if someone IS watching, you might as well give them a reason to keep watching!"
- Everything else in my room could be a complete and utter mess, but my DVDs and PS3 games will all be in order and in their correct cases. You won't find any of my discs laying bare and face down anywhere, nor will you open up the case for one movie/game and find the wrong disc in it.
"God and science do not oppose or contradict each other. Science is what happens when God decides to let mankind take a peak at his blueprints."
- When I was younger, I thought that my favorite color was purple. This was actually my mom's doing, because everything she bought me (bookbag, pencil boxes, scissors, etc.) was purple, due to the fact that my dad pledged Omega Psi Phi. I have obviously rebelled since then.
"A little bit of craziness helps keep the insanity away."
- I like women of all heights, but for some strange reason I have a thing for tall women. Not taller than me, of course. Somewhere in the 5'5 - 5'9 range. Don't ask me why, I'm still trying to figure that one out.
"I've come to appreciate randomness in its appropriate doses."
- I have a weird form of jealousy. If I am attracted to you in any capacity (I don't even necessarily have to like you romantically) and another guy is getting more attention from you than I am, I get jealous. I'm able to keep from showing it 'cause I know its all in my head, but it's there all the same.
"The things that people DON'T say or fail to say often speak so much louder than the things they actually say."
- I'm a big fan of the Horror Movie genre, especially ones that are deep and intricate and have good plot twists. I'm actually more likely to laugh during a horror movie than be scared by one. I'm still looking for a movie that can really scare me. Yeah, I might just be slightly sick in the head...
"If the dancefloor were a highway, we'd all be DEAD."
- I can't stand when people chew w/ their mouths open. That is the most annoying sound to me.
"Love is like a highway: all the signs are obvious, but we only acknowledge them when they're convenient for us."
- I'm a conflict avoider and can't stand to have anyone mad at me. I don't feel right if I even THINK you're mad at me. I hate being in conflicts, so when one actually occurs, I go out of my way to resolve it, even if I know it's not my fault.
"Some people are a trip. Others, however, are an all-expenses-paid vacation. You just gotta figure out if they're worth the time off."
- I can't stand country music, but I can recite "Goodbye Earl" by the Dixie Chix by heart.
"Your mind & heart should work together, running checks and balances on each other. Never make decisions w/out input from both."
- I'm fiercely loyal to my home sports teams. I support my Hawks and Falcons, regardless of their records. Yes, I was down w/ them before they started doing well. I figure, if you're gonna be a fan, be a true fan, not one who only supports when it's convenient. Atlanta has too many fair weather fans.
"It's hot as fish grease outside..."
- I have a huge fascination with big cats, especially black panthers (no militant or racial influence there, I promise). I don't really care for Lions too much, though. They remind me of the types of people who always have to have an entourage of people around them, giving off that arrogant or unapproachable vibe.
"That's Beautiful." (My all-purpose phrase for anything good, bad, funny, tragic, etc.)
- I never gave any thought to dancing before I found salsa. I was quite the wall-flower (or, wall-weed since I'm a guy) prior to salsa, and had serious stage fright.
"Off tha chain like a free slave!"
- I was born on the first day of winter (In 1982, Winter solstice was Dec. 22). Maybe that's why, if forced to choose between the two, I'd choose to be too cold instead of too hot.
"Fresh breath is VERY underrated..."
- I was a very picky eater as a child. I wouldn't eat sandwiches, chicken, or fish, and I would only eat the toppings off of my pizza, leaving the crust. All that has changed, of course.
"Put some STANK on it!"
- I eat my burger before my fries. One day I realized that pretty much everyone else does the opposite.
"You got more issues than a magazine stand."
- I eat my cereal dry on purpose. However, I will drink milk as a beverage along w/ it, but only strawberry or chocolate.
"You'll never look good until you're not afraid to look stupid"
- I have a large dark birthmark that resembles freckles on my left arm that goes from the edge of my shoulder to just above my elbow. There is also a small stray dot of it that somehow made it to my right forearm.
"Being lead by your heart is like being lead by a Magic 8-Ball"
- I have an older half-brother that I've known for about 2 and a half years now. However, one would think that I was the half-brother out of the 3 of us, since I'm the only male in the family under 200 lbs, and I look everything like my mom and nothing like my dad.
"There's a reason why your windshield is bigger than your rear-view mirror."
- My name is indirectly a Biblical name. It is Greek for Myrrh, which is the scent that they gave baby Jesus as a gift. I've also seen it translated to mean "sweet smelling oil/balm" or "fragrant oil", which, in layman's terms would mean "cologne."
"Your dancing should reflect the music you're dancing to; so much that a deaf person would be able too see what the music would look like by watching you dance."
- My initials are MMA, which is funny since I am a big UFC fan (MMA = Mixed Martial Arts)
"Dancing is when your body says things that you never knew you wanted to say. You express things that words would never be able to describe."
- I'm very "anti-cliche". Meaning, if "everybody and they momma" likes/does/wears something, there's a good chance that I won't, simply for that reason. For example, if I see both Beyonce and Amerie at the mall and could only choose one autograph, I'm going straight for Amerie.
"Dance like no one is watching. But, if someone IS watching, you might as well give them a reason to keep watching!"
- Everything else in my room could be a complete and utter mess, but my DVDs and PS3 games will all be in order and in their correct cases. You won't find any of my discs laying bare and face down anywhere, nor will you open up the case for one movie/game and find the wrong disc in it.
"God and science do not oppose or contradict each other. Science is what happens when God decides to let mankind take a peak at his blueprints."
- When I was younger, I thought that my favorite color was purple. This was actually my mom's doing, because everything she bought me (bookbag, pencil boxes, scissors, etc.) was purple, due to the fact that my dad pledged Omega Psi Phi. I have obviously rebelled since then.
"A little bit of craziness helps keep the insanity away."
- I like women of all heights, but for some strange reason I have a thing for tall women. Not taller than me, of course. Somewhere in the 5'5 - 5'9 range. Don't ask me why, I'm still trying to figure that one out.
"I've come to appreciate randomness in its appropriate doses."
- I have a weird form of jealousy. If I am attracted to you in any capacity (I don't even necessarily have to like you romantically) and another guy is getting more attention from you than I am, I get jealous. I'm able to keep from showing it 'cause I know its all in my head, but it's there all the same.
"The things that people DON'T say or fail to say often speak so much louder than the things they actually say."
- I'm a big fan of the Horror Movie genre, especially ones that are deep and intricate and have good plot twists. I'm actually more likely to laugh during a horror movie than be scared by one. I'm still looking for a movie that can really scare me. Yeah, I might just be slightly sick in the head...
"If the dancefloor were a highway, we'd all be DEAD."
- I can't stand when people chew w/ their mouths open. That is the most annoying sound to me.
"Love is like a highway: all the signs are obvious, but we only acknowledge them when they're convenient for us."
- I'm a conflict avoider and can't stand to have anyone mad at me. I don't feel right if I even THINK you're mad at me. I hate being in conflicts, so when one actually occurs, I go out of my way to resolve it, even if I know it's not my fault.
"Some people are a trip. Others, however, are an all-expenses-paid vacation. You just gotta figure out if they're worth the time off."
- I can't stand country music, but I can recite "Goodbye Earl" by the Dixie Chix by heart.
"Your mind & heart should work together, running checks and balances on each other. Never make decisions w/out input from both."
- I'm fiercely loyal to my home sports teams. I support my Hawks and Falcons, regardless of their records. Yes, I was down w/ them before they started doing well. I figure, if you're gonna be a fan, be a true fan, not one who only supports when it's convenient. Atlanta has too many fair weather fans.
"It's hot as fish grease outside..."
- I have a huge fascination with big cats, especially black panthers (no militant or racial influence there, I promise). I don't really care for Lions too much, though. They remind me of the types of people who always have to have an entourage of people around them, giving off that arrogant or unapproachable vibe.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
If The Dancefloor Was a Highway...
...we'd all be DEAD.
That's the conclusion I've come to recently in regards to my adventures in salsa land. While the overall issue here is something that I've noticed for quite some time, only recently have I made this connection. What issue am I speaking of? Lack of floorcraft on the dancefloor.
What is floorcraft, you ask? I must apologize to those of you who are reading this blog; if you have to ask what that is, I fear that it is indeed you who I am complaining about. I promise you, it's nothing personal. Ok, I digress... What is floorcraft? It is the art of keeping a consistent area of space as you dance. Consider a highway for a moment: at any given moment, there are countless cars out there on the highways and interstates. Of course there are many accidents, but the number of people who travel and make it to and from their daily destinations safely far outweighs the number of accidents. Still, accidents --both fatal and non-fatal-- happen every day. I don't have the statistics on it, but I'm sure you could imagine. Why do these accidents happen? There are a plethora of reasons: speeding, weaving in and out of traffic unnecessarily, not staying in one's lane, texting while driving, applying makeup while driving, or just plain not paying attention.
What does this have to do with dancing? While on the road, it is of the utmost importance to pay attention not just to what you're doing and how you're doing it, but to those doing the same thing in your vicinity as well. Any considerable lack of this can and often will result in an accident. The same is the case for the dancefloor. (Ok, I realize that accidents on the dancefloor are no where near as life-threatening as on the road, but work with me here.) Yes, there's alot going on. You're focused on leading or following your partner, depending on your gender. You're making a connection with said partner; after all, you're dancing with her/him, not everyone else in the room. You're dancing to the beat of the music and trying to be in sync with it. You're trying to queue up your moves in your head ahead of time so as not to bore your partner if you're a lead, or trying to fit your styling in while not being lost in your partner's crazy turn patterns if you're a follower.
HOWEVER... All of this must be done while being aware of those doing the exact same thing around you. Or must it? Apparently, not everyone considers this to be necessary. I've been stepped on, bumped into, and elbowed enough times to know this to be true. Now, if you have a huge problem with any of these things happening to you, maybe salsa dancing (or any other partner dance that takes place on a crowded dancefloor) isn't for you. With that said, it's not really the symptoms of this issue that I'm complaining about. These things are bound to happen and I feel that they are small prices to pay for the overall thrill and enjoyment I get from dancing salsa.
What does bother me is the root of this issue, which I feel is a lack of awareness and concern for one's surroundings. Ok, I take that back... just a lack of concern is what irks me. I'm removing lack of awareness because unless you're blind (in which case, I suspect you wouldn't be anywhere near a dancefloor OR in a driver's seat) you are aware of the fact that there are other people in constant movement around you. Since people know that there are others around them dancing, then they must not care. Now, I won't go so far as to say that this is a malicious lack of concern in all cases. I don't think the majority of the dancers out there are thinking to themselves, "Ok, this dancefloor is MINE. I don't give a flyin' flock of birds who is around me; I'm going to take up as much space as necessary for me to do whatever I want, whenever I want. Sucks to be you if you're in my way." I pray that I'm right in assuming that this is not the case with most people.
The fact still remains, however, that although most people aren't purposely being selfish and inconsiderate, they still tend to do things as if no one else is affected. Guys lead moves without considering whether or not they actually have room to do them: spinning their partners into people and dipping them so that their heads come within inches of unexpected head-trauma. Ladies style without restraint, oblivious to the dancers who just happen to be within reach of their outstretched manicured nails or heels. Again, none of this is usually done w/ harmful intent, but the people who do these things behave as if they are in their own little world. Bad thing is, they don't realize that there are many other "own little worlds" around them just waiting to collide with theirs. Ah, when worlds collide...
A salsa friend of mine once joked with me that I should teach a class on protecting one's partner while dancing. I've built a reputation as being someone who puts a premium on keeping his dance partner out of harms way. I laughed at it at first, but after thinking about it more, I wondered if I should seriously consider it. I thought back to the numerous dance classes and workshops that I've taken in my 7+ years of dancing salsa, and I can't remember floorcraft being addressed as anything more than a side-thought. I wish I could say that I could recall someone actually taking time out of a class and expressing how important it is to maintain a consistent area of space while dancing. Granted, On1/LA and On2/NY style salsa are danced in slots, and staying on the slot is emphasized, but it is not necessary to dance on a slot to have good floorcraft (plus, people can tend to make their "slots" extra wide and long). I've seen many a slot-style dancer display horrible floorcraft. Anyway, I do feel like this concept could stand to be stressed a lot more in classes. To take a whole 5-10 minutes out of a class would be a bit much I think (most peoples' attention spans won't allow for it); it would be much more practical to touch on it as other moves and techniques are taught. For example, during a cross-body lead, telling the leads to look in the direction that he intends to guide his partner on the 3 so as to make sure that no one/thing is already occupying that space, or teaching followers to pay attention to and stay within their leads' frame while turning.
Even though certain techniques can indeed be taught in order to encourage floorcraft, I think it's more of a mindset or a mentality than anything. Personally, I'd like to think I'm a very considerate person. Almost to a fault, at times. While I may have my moments every other blue moon, there is something in me that just won't allow me to purposely impose on someone else or do anything with reckless abandon, knowing that my actions could directly affect someone else. So when it comes to dancing, as much as I'd like to be selfish and just go for mine, I just can't bring myself to dance in such a way that I endanger those around me. Sometimes I feel that I spend so much time protecting myself and my partner that I don't really get much out of a dance. Now, while I'm glad to do it if it means my partner remains safe while on my watch, I can't help but wonder sometimes if I'm the only person on the floor making any kind of effort to do this, sacrificing my own enjoyment for the sake of others. I will admit, while I don't show it (or at least I try not to... I apologize for anyone who may have fallen victim to any optic blasts shot from my evil eyes), I can be pretty disdainful of people around me who aren't making at least some effort to be considerate of others. At that point, I have to remind myself that not everyone thinks like I do. Maybe this is a not-so-humble opinion, but I think the dancefloor would be a much less chaotic place if they did. Oh well... I guess I'll continue to dance and dodge until then; trying my best to make my dodging look like dancing ;-)
That's the conclusion I've come to recently in regards to my adventures in salsa land. While the overall issue here is something that I've noticed for quite some time, only recently have I made this connection. What issue am I speaking of? Lack of floorcraft on the dancefloor.
What is floorcraft, you ask? I must apologize to those of you who are reading this blog; if you have to ask what that is, I fear that it is indeed you who I am complaining about. I promise you, it's nothing personal. Ok, I digress... What is floorcraft? It is the art of keeping a consistent area of space as you dance. Consider a highway for a moment: at any given moment, there are countless cars out there on the highways and interstates. Of course there are many accidents, but the number of people who travel and make it to and from their daily destinations safely far outweighs the number of accidents. Still, accidents --both fatal and non-fatal-- happen every day. I don't have the statistics on it, but I'm sure you could imagine. Why do these accidents happen? There are a plethora of reasons: speeding, weaving in and out of traffic unnecessarily, not staying in one's lane, texting while driving, applying makeup while driving, or just plain not paying attention.
What does this have to do with dancing? While on the road, it is of the utmost importance to pay attention not just to what you're doing and how you're doing it, but to those doing the same thing in your vicinity as well. Any considerable lack of this can and often will result in an accident. The same is the case for the dancefloor. (Ok, I realize that accidents on the dancefloor are no where near as life-threatening as on the road, but work with me here.) Yes, there's alot going on. You're focused on leading or following your partner, depending on your gender. You're making a connection with said partner; after all, you're dancing with her/him, not everyone else in the room. You're dancing to the beat of the music and trying to be in sync with it. You're trying to queue up your moves in your head ahead of time so as not to bore your partner if you're a lead, or trying to fit your styling in while not being lost in your partner's crazy turn patterns if you're a follower.
HOWEVER... All of this must be done while being aware of those doing the exact same thing around you. Or must it? Apparently, not everyone considers this to be necessary. I've been stepped on, bumped into, and elbowed enough times to know this to be true. Now, if you have a huge problem with any of these things happening to you, maybe salsa dancing (or any other partner dance that takes place on a crowded dancefloor) isn't for you. With that said, it's not really the symptoms of this issue that I'm complaining about. These things are bound to happen and I feel that they are small prices to pay for the overall thrill and enjoyment I get from dancing salsa.
What does bother me is the root of this issue, which I feel is a lack of awareness and concern for one's surroundings. Ok, I take that back... just a lack of concern is what irks me. I'm removing lack of awareness because unless you're blind (in which case, I suspect you wouldn't be anywhere near a dancefloor OR in a driver's seat) you are aware of the fact that there are other people in constant movement around you. Since people know that there are others around them dancing, then they must not care. Now, I won't go so far as to say that this is a malicious lack of concern in all cases. I don't think the majority of the dancers out there are thinking to themselves, "Ok, this dancefloor is MINE. I don't give a flyin' flock of birds who is around me; I'm going to take up as much space as necessary for me to do whatever I want, whenever I want. Sucks to be you if you're in my way." I pray that I'm right in assuming that this is not the case with most people.
The fact still remains, however, that although most people aren't purposely being selfish and inconsiderate, they still tend to do things as if no one else is affected. Guys lead moves without considering whether or not they actually have room to do them: spinning their partners into people and dipping them so that their heads come within inches of unexpected head-trauma. Ladies style without restraint, oblivious to the dancers who just happen to be within reach of their outstretched manicured nails or heels. Again, none of this is usually done w/ harmful intent, but the people who do these things behave as if they are in their own little world. Bad thing is, they don't realize that there are many other "own little worlds" around them just waiting to collide with theirs. Ah, when worlds collide...
A salsa friend of mine once joked with me that I should teach a class on protecting one's partner while dancing. I've built a reputation as being someone who puts a premium on keeping his dance partner out of harms way. I laughed at it at first, but after thinking about it more, I wondered if I should seriously consider it. I thought back to the numerous dance classes and workshops that I've taken in my 7+ years of dancing salsa, and I can't remember floorcraft being addressed as anything more than a side-thought. I wish I could say that I could recall someone actually taking time out of a class and expressing how important it is to maintain a consistent area of space while dancing. Granted, On1/LA and On2/NY style salsa are danced in slots, and staying on the slot is emphasized, but it is not necessary to dance on a slot to have good floorcraft (plus, people can tend to make their "slots" extra wide and long). I've seen many a slot-style dancer display horrible floorcraft. Anyway, I do feel like this concept could stand to be stressed a lot more in classes. To take a whole 5-10 minutes out of a class would be a bit much I think (most peoples' attention spans won't allow for it); it would be much more practical to touch on it as other moves and techniques are taught. For example, during a cross-body lead, telling the leads to look in the direction that he intends to guide his partner on the 3 so as to make sure that no one/thing is already occupying that space, or teaching followers to pay attention to and stay within their leads' frame while turning.
Even though certain techniques can indeed be taught in order to encourage floorcraft, I think it's more of a mindset or a mentality than anything. Personally, I'd like to think I'm a very considerate person. Almost to a fault, at times. While I may have my moments every other blue moon, there is something in me that just won't allow me to purposely impose on someone else or do anything with reckless abandon, knowing that my actions could directly affect someone else. So when it comes to dancing, as much as I'd like to be selfish and just go for mine, I just can't bring myself to dance in such a way that I endanger those around me. Sometimes I feel that I spend so much time protecting myself and my partner that I don't really get much out of a dance. Now, while I'm glad to do it if it means my partner remains safe while on my watch, I can't help but wonder sometimes if I'm the only person on the floor making any kind of effort to do this, sacrificing my own enjoyment for the sake of others. I will admit, while I don't show it (or at least I try not to... I apologize for anyone who may have fallen victim to any optic blasts shot from my evil eyes), I can be pretty disdainful of people around me who aren't making at least some effort to be considerate of others. At that point, I have to remind myself that not everyone thinks like I do. Maybe this is a not-so-humble opinion, but I think the dancefloor would be a much less chaotic place if they did. Oh well... I guess I'll continue to dance and dodge until then; trying my best to make my dodging look like dancing ;-)
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
The Evolution of SMOOVE: My salsa story
Being a young man of non-Hispanic descent, I'm often asked "how did you get into salsa?" I'm pretty sure many of you who have stumbled upon my blog here or know of me otherwise have wondered the same thing. Since I haven't blogged in half of a forever, I decided I'd take some time out to share with you all my "salsa story."
My first encounter with Latin dancing that I remember was my final semester of High School, circa 2000. My school was having a multi-cultural festival that day and I witnessed many of my friends participating in the Latin portion of the event. I wasn't sure what I was really looking at at the time (in retrospect, I think it was Merengue they were dancing), but I can remember thinking to myself, "I wish I could do that!!!" Not only was I wishing that I could dance like that, but also wishing that I had the nerve to do anything in front of a large crowd. (Would you believe I'm a recovering glossophobe?) Other than learning how to do a turtle from reading online break dancing instructions (that's the only breakin' move I have, but I'm halfway decent at it), I had given no prior thought to dancing or had any training in it whatsoever.
Ok, fast forward about a year and some change... I'm in my 2nd year of college at FAMU and courting a young lady who would eventually become my girlfriend (now ex of course). On our 2nd date, she told me that she liked to dance. When I asked the specific kind, she said latin dancing. I expressed that I had always wanted to learn. So, on our next date, she decided to take me out. Our plans were to go to Atlantis, Tallahassee's only Latin night club. However, a little less than an hour before date time, she informs me that plans have changed and we're now going to a house party that our Church's single's ministry was having. Now, far be it from me to argue about plans when in the company of a gorgeous woman and she's taking me out. I would find out later on that she changed plans because she thought I really didn't want to go salsa dancing and only wanted to go to please her. That was so far from the truth, but good luck convincing her of that. Surely, I tried. I spent several dates trying to take her there, but something would always come up. Fast forward to Valentine's Day 2002: we've been boyfriend & girlfriend for about 2 months now and we're FINALLY headed to Atlantis. We got our lesson in, but I didn't really catch on then. Again, I think the instructor was teaching us Merengue and not salsa, now that I think about it. Not that I knew any better.
Ok, let's hop back into the time machine and skip forward to September-ish of that year. My lady and I parted ways 4 months prior; I had moved back to Atlanta, and she had moved back to New Jersey. After Church one Sunday, we were all having lunch at a diner when one brother from our campus ministry announced to us all that he would be teaching salsa lessons after Church every Sunday. For free. He was doing this as a way to reach out to people who weren't necessarily into Church, and also just for the campus ministry to have something else to do. Of course, the key word for me was "free", I was all in upon hearing that. I thought to myself, "I've always been interested. And it's free... So why the heck not?"
We'll pause here for a moment. For every guy who has been dancing salsa for a decent amount of time, there is always a woman involved in his story somewhere. Maybe it was because of, maybe it was in spite of. Contrary to what my friends at the time in Tallahassee would tell you, for me, it was in spite of. Let's re-visit the situation w/ my now ex. Throughout our short-lived time as a couple, she often expressed that she felt I wasn't being a very good leader in the relationship; both in general and spiritually. This was my very first relationship ever, so I wasn't used to that dynamic. On top of that, I'm not a naturally assertive, "take charge" type of person. Though I would find out much later that it wasn't the case, I had always believed that this was the reason she broke up with me. It would be a very long time after that before I would be able to hear any mention of leading or taking charge without feeling like it was directed towards me, whether it really was or not. Whenever I would hear those words or that concept, it would always sting more than a little bit, and I would always hear it in her voice. Calm and soft-spoken as that voice was, it always felt like a Muay-Thai leg kick to my confidence.
Considering all of that, you can imagine my struggles during the "beginner's hell" stage of my salsa career. Most beginner leads either lead too hard or lead to soft. Being the non-aggressive person that I am, I always erred to the softer side. This "beginner's hell" stage is where most guys either get sifted out, or become determined to get better. Those who do the latter normally end up being pretty decent at least, if not better. It was my whole battle w/ my own flaws that actually motivated me to stick with salsa. I wasn't necessarily motivated by my ex herself, but by what she represented for me in my life. She was a constant reminder of a weakness of mine, and I was tired of hearing about it. So while I may not have completely transformed into a super-confident, extra-assertive man of a man, I think God had it in his plan for me to learn salsa to help me grow out of my old, timid self.
Not only do I think that God used it as as tool to help me grow, but I also think he did it to give me something else to be passionate about. Throughout the earlier part of my life, I had many things that I liked to do, but nothing that I absolutely had to do. I loved video games, basketball, football (not that I was horribly good at either sport), art, and many other things, but I could go days, weeks, months, even years without doing any of those. Salsa, however, is a different story. I often joke that anything past 2 weeks w/ out dancing would cause me to break out in hives and start twitching and scratching my neck like Tyrone Biggums. I still remember the day that I decided I was hooked. It was the Summer of 2004. I finally turned 21 about 6 months or so before, and I was hungry to find any and everything Salsa in Atlanta (little did I know that there were events other than clubs that didn't require me to be 21 to get into, so there was actually no need for me to wait). A friend of mine and I would go to Loca Luna every other weekend to dance salsa. Mind you, I was still in my "salsa scrub" days, but I never felt fulfilled upon leaving there because, despite not being at even the intermediate level, none of the girls there could really keep up. Never mind the fact that this was more so the "meet/meat market crowd" and not the "salsero" crowd, so I was also getting turned down for dances 50% or more of the time. One fateful day, I found out about a social at The Sanctuary (where I now teach on Fridays). It just so happened that many "salsa-celebs" were in the house that night: Gordon Neil, Ismael Otereo, and Juan Matos, just to name few. I spent several minutes picking my jaw up off of the ground from amazement while watching their performances. I was a bit nervous when it came time for the social dancing to resume, however. I figured, "Everybody in this room is a PRO. If those girls at Loca Luna turned me down half the time, it'll surely be worse here." Boy, was I wrong, and I'm glad I was. I didn't get turned down at all that night! I realized I had finally found what I was looking for. I've been a proud salsaholic ever since then. Here I am, many years, salsa socials, salsa congresses, and one 1st place salsa contest finish later. :-)
My first encounter with Latin dancing that I remember was my final semester of High School, circa 2000. My school was having a multi-cultural festival that day and I witnessed many of my friends participating in the Latin portion of the event. I wasn't sure what I was really looking at at the time (in retrospect, I think it was Merengue they were dancing), but I can remember thinking to myself, "I wish I could do that!!!" Not only was I wishing that I could dance like that, but also wishing that I had the nerve to do anything in front of a large crowd. (Would you believe I'm a recovering glossophobe?) Other than learning how to do a turtle from reading online break dancing instructions (that's the only breakin' move I have, but I'm halfway decent at it), I had given no prior thought to dancing or had any training in it whatsoever.
Ok, fast forward about a year and some change... I'm in my 2nd year of college at FAMU and courting a young lady who would eventually become my girlfriend (now ex of course). On our 2nd date, she told me that she liked to dance. When I asked the specific kind, she said latin dancing. I expressed that I had always wanted to learn. So, on our next date, she decided to take me out. Our plans were to go to Atlantis, Tallahassee's only Latin night club. However, a little less than an hour before date time, she informs me that plans have changed and we're now going to a house party that our Church's single's ministry was having. Now, far be it from me to argue about plans when in the company of a gorgeous woman and she's taking me out. I would find out later on that she changed plans because she thought I really didn't want to go salsa dancing and only wanted to go to please her. That was so far from the truth, but good luck convincing her of that. Surely, I tried. I spent several dates trying to take her there, but something would always come up. Fast forward to Valentine's Day 2002: we've been boyfriend & girlfriend for about 2 months now and we're FINALLY headed to Atlantis. We got our lesson in, but I didn't really catch on then. Again, I think the instructor was teaching us Merengue and not salsa, now that I think about it. Not that I knew any better.
Ok, let's hop back into the time machine and skip forward to September-ish of that year. My lady and I parted ways 4 months prior; I had moved back to Atlanta, and she had moved back to New Jersey. After Church one Sunday, we were all having lunch at a diner when one brother from our campus ministry announced to us all that he would be teaching salsa lessons after Church every Sunday. For free. He was doing this as a way to reach out to people who weren't necessarily into Church, and also just for the campus ministry to have something else to do. Of course, the key word for me was "free", I was all in upon hearing that. I thought to myself, "I've always been interested. And it's free... So why the heck not?"
We'll pause here for a moment. For every guy who has been dancing salsa for a decent amount of time, there is always a woman involved in his story somewhere. Maybe it was because of, maybe it was in spite of. Contrary to what my friends at the time in Tallahassee would tell you, for me, it was in spite of. Let's re-visit the situation w/ my now ex. Throughout our short-lived time as a couple, she often expressed that she felt I wasn't being a very good leader in the relationship; both in general and spiritually. This was my very first relationship ever, so I wasn't used to that dynamic. On top of that, I'm not a naturally assertive, "take charge" type of person. Though I would find out much later that it wasn't the case, I had always believed that this was the reason she broke up with me. It would be a very long time after that before I would be able to hear any mention of leading or taking charge without feeling like it was directed towards me, whether it really was or not. Whenever I would hear those words or that concept, it would always sting more than a little bit, and I would always hear it in her voice. Calm and soft-spoken as that voice was, it always felt like a Muay-Thai leg kick to my confidence.
Considering all of that, you can imagine my struggles during the "beginner's hell" stage of my salsa career. Most beginner leads either lead too hard or lead to soft. Being the non-aggressive person that I am, I always erred to the softer side. This "beginner's hell" stage is where most guys either get sifted out, or become determined to get better. Those who do the latter normally end up being pretty decent at least, if not better. It was my whole battle w/ my own flaws that actually motivated me to stick with salsa. I wasn't necessarily motivated by my ex herself, but by what she represented for me in my life. She was a constant reminder of a weakness of mine, and I was tired of hearing about it. So while I may not have completely transformed into a super-confident, extra-assertive man of a man, I think God had it in his plan for me to learn salsa to help me grow out of my old, timid self.
Not only do I think that God used it as as tool to help me grow, but I also think he did it to give me something else to be passionate about. Throughout the earlier part of my life, I had many things that I liked to do, but nothing that I absolutely had to do. I loved video games, basketball, football (not that I was horribly good at either sport), art, and many other things, but I could go days, weeks, months, even years without doing any of those. Salsa, however, is a different story. I often joke that anything past 2 weeks w/ out dancing would cause me to break out in hives and start twitching and scratching my neck like Tyrone Biggums. I still remember the day that I decided I was hooked. It was the Summer of 2004. I finally turned 21 about 6 months or so before, and I was hungry to find any and everything Salsa in Atlanta (little did I know that there were events other than clubs that didn't require me to be 21 to get into, so there was actually no need for me to wait). A friend of mine and I would go to Loca Luna every other weekend to dance salsa. Mind you, I was still in my "salsa scrub" days, but I never felt fulfilled upon leaving there because, despite not being at even the intermediate level, none of the girls there could really keep up. Never mind the fact that this was more so the "meet/meat market crowd" and not the "salsero" crowd, so I was also getting turned down for dances 50% or more of the time. One fateful day, I found out about a social at The Sanctuary (where I now teach on Fridays). It just so happened that many "salsa-celebs" were in the house that night: Gordon Neil, Ismael Otereo, and Juan Matos, just to name few. I spent several minutes picking my jaw up off of the ground from amazement while watching their performances. I was a bit nervous when it came time for the social dancing to resume, however. I figured, "Everybody in this room is a PRO. If those girls at Loca Luna turned me down half the time, it'll surely be worse here." Boy, was I wrong, and I'm glad I was. I didn't get turned down at all that night! I realized I had finally found what I was looking for. I've been a proud salsaholic ever since then. Here I am, many years, salsa socials, salsa congresses, and one 1st place salsa contest finish later. :-)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)