Cosplay, just like any other community, has its own code of
etiquette. These unspoken rules are in
place to help ensure that everyone has a good time and to keep things
orderly. A few of them are pretty
obvious (or, they should be, anyway).
Don't touch someone (their costumes and props included) without their
permission. Compliment someone if you
like their cosplay. Keep it to yourself
if you don't. Don't block hallways,
entrances, and escalators while taking photos.
I could keep going, but you get the idea. There's one particular rule, however, that I
just can't get on board with. It's not a
hard and fast rule, and there are mixed opinions on it, so I doubt anyone will
get thrown out of a con for violating it.
But apparently, there's a rule that, when taking a photo of someone who's part of a
group, you must take a photo of the entire group, or none at all.
Let me preface the rest of this by saying that I'm not one
to exclude people from a picture or tell people to get out of a picture. When I'm aware that it's a group cosplay, I
grab a picture of everyone and then maybe grab some individual shots
afterwards. For me, it's just the
thought of being obligated to that's the off-putting thing for me.
I've never been verbally told by someone I wanted a photo of
I had to take one of everyone or no one, but I've had a few situations that,
while they weren't too serious, lead me to believe they felt that way. In each case, the person I asked to
photograph was a few feet away another person, or it just wasn't super obvious
to me that they were part of a larger group.
I'd ask for a photo, and they'd agree, but they they'd flag their friend
down to come and get in the picture. In
my head, I'm thinking "Um... I asked for a photo of you, not anyone
else. If I wanted a photo of your
friend(s), I'd have asked". To
avoid awkwardness, I just go ahead and take the photo, then ask for an
individual shot after. However, to me,
that person is the one who's making it awkward by forcing someone else into the
picture. As if to say, "Hey, I know
you only asked me for a picture, but I think this other person really needs to
be in your picture." But why force
someone else to be in a picture that you all have less than a 50-50 chance of
ever seeing again anyway?
However, I did run into one particularly awkward
situation. I was at Dragon*Con 2014,
taking photos on the outskirts of a Final Fantasy photo shoot. As I waited for my favorite characters to not
be busy with current group shots, I saw two guys dressed as Squall and Laguna
from FFVIII, so I asked for a photo.
When they agreed, a girl (who at the time I thought was just random)
jumped into the pic, and after I kindly as possible told her I was only trying
to get Squall and Laguna, refused to get out of the pic. I declined to use my normal tactic of asking
for individual shots later, as I got the impression that she would have jumped
into that one too, and she lingered too close for me to do it discreetly. I would later realize that she was a legit
FFVIII character (albeit a much lesser-known one, Raine), but I still felt she
was rude for imposing herself into my photo.
After all, we were at a photo shoot for that fandom... what, are you
gonna jump into every side photo?
Personally, I never assume I'm included in a picture unless I'm being
directed. I'd rather have the
photographer ask me to jump in than to have him or her ask me to get out, which
would be embarrassing.
She just RE. FUSED. to get out of the photo. -_-
Ok, forgive my rant there...
But I think you guys get where I'm coming from. And don't get me wrong, I get why people may
have this mentality. I've read that some
cosplayers feel slighted when others around them get asked for photos and they
don't, whether they're in a group cosplay from the same fandom, just in a group
of friends, or just chatting with several people. Many get the feeling that their cosplay isn't
worthy of a photo when they don't get asked for a photo but someone near them
does, or that the photographer is non-verbally saying that their cosplay
sucks. And some cosplayers feel just plain
left out and excluded in these moments.
For that reason, sometimes the more popular members of a group cosplay
will set the "all of us or none of us" rule in order to prevent this.
Don't get me wrong, I totally understand these feelings, and
am not above having them myself. Though
I've shed a lot of it and am continually growing in how to deal with what's
left, I still have a lot of insecurity deep down. And just like "game recognize
game", insecurity recognizes insecurity, and I feel like insecurity is at
the root of these situations. Dare I
say, maybe even a little bit of vanity.
Even though the majority of us cosplay for ourselves and our own
enjoyment, at the end of the day, I do believe we also want recognition. We all want to know that at least somebody
else enjoyed our work, and the validation that we did a good job. But, while it can be a good indicator that
people like our work, we cannot place the worth of our work and cosplays on how
many people asked us for pictures. I'm
not saying that this is an easy mindset to achieve, but you have to get to the
point where you being satisfied with you work and enjoying yourself is all that
matters.
Besides, there are too many factors that go into why someone
did or didn't ask one for a photo for anyone to get bent out of shape over
it. Yes, there are some photographers
and photo-takers (ie, just random con attendees and cosplayers) who will
overlook cosplayers due to their own elitism, racism, or anything else that
falls under the umbrella of shallowness.
But much more often, a photographer may not ask you for a pic for a
myriad of genuine, non-malicious reasons.
Personally, I know that not everyone is going to like my cosplay, but
not necessarily because of the quality.
They may not recognize my character.
I tend to do a lot of obscure or just not mainstream characters, so
sometimes I can go hours between photo ops in some of my costumes. My costume may not stand out to some
people. The character I'm cosplaying may
not be someone's favorite. Some people
take photos of every cosplayer they come across, while others may only take
photos of someone who really catches their eye, or only of their favorite
characters. What I'm saying is, just
like with being rejected or not being asked out, someone not asking you for a
photo most often has little to nothing to do with you, and more to do with the
photographer.
Ok, I'm done rambling for now. What do you guys think? How do you feel when those around you are
asked for photos and you're not? Does it
rub you the wrong way, or does it not even register for you? Let me know in the comments!
